Overall, I have to say its not my kind of movie. I enjoyed the first one quite a bit and really liked finding the ways the characters and story line could relate to the gospel. Frodo was seemingly just an ordinary simple young man and yet, he was chosen to save the world. After the first one ended I looked forward to seeing the second. While watching the second one it was hard not to cover my face with the blanket. The battle scenes were horrible and there was far to many of them. Those nasty creatures coming out of their birth sacks was over the top gross and scary. Clint on the other hand thought it was great how well they depicted evil. I guess evil just really makes me uncomfortable. I experienced much of the same on the 3rd movie but as Frodo was using everything he had to bring the ring up the mountain I was filled with hope. I was waiting for him to over throw evil and toss the ring into the fire. But he didn't! He put it on instead!!! WHAT!?! I thought this was going to be a story of redemption!?! I thought Frodo was going to save the world. Yes, the ring eventually made its way into the fire and the world was saved, but not by Frodos doing. I was very disappointed in that.
After the movie Clint explained to me that its about the battle with flesh until the very end. Okay, so now I get it, but I don't like it! In fact I hate it! Not the movie, but the flesh.
As I shared in my last post I have food issues. For me, this is a battle between my sinful desires (the flesh) and the Spirit. My friend Crystal shared in this amazing teaching on gluttony that she woke up every morning for a time and the Holy Spirit was making her food choices for her. Oh, how I longed to experience that for myself. And finally, one day it happened! After repenting of my sin and daily, hourly, sometimes minute by minute seeking the help He has given me, the Holy Spirit as been making my food choices too! I praise God! It actually felt easy to choose good healthy food and to not go back for seconds. It was all credit to the Holy Spirits work in me. For 13 days the Spirit was winning the battle!!!
Then day 14,15 and 16 came. Those 3 days were not the same as the previous 13. When I woke up yesterday (day 16) I new I had been in a funk for a couple days. No, I hadn't binge eaten or anything but I knew my heart and attitude weren't in the right place, so I had to pause and reflect. What I saw was that I started to lean on my own strength. Kind of like Frodo did when he took off up the mountain with out Sam. Just like Frodo, my own strength is not enough. Frodo came all that way and surely he should be able to make it a little ways on his own, right? NO! But that is the thinking I realize I all to often have.
So day 16 when I realize all this... rather then turning to the Spirit to guide me, I wallowed in my mistake. I knew I needed pray, but I didn't. I knew I needed my sista's to be praying for me and that all I would need to do is send a simple text, but I didn't. So what did I do? I ate. I want to hate myself for yesterday. I want to wallow in my self loathing pit and probably end up eating some more, but I can't. Why? Because I am loved! I am chosen! I am accepted! I am adopted! I am forgiven! I am blessed and I am redeemed!!! Like one of my favorite songs by Mary Mary says "I know He didn't bring me this far just to leave me."
Just like Frodo, I often think I can do it on my own. Just like Frodo, I can't. Just like Frodo needs Sam all the way to the bitter end, I need the Holy Spirit until my end on this earth.
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